He looks like he just walked out of a biker bar, with a shaved head and a red goatee. Heavy muscles lie across his shoulders and carve his torso into a prototypical V-shape. Sinew and bone compose his small hands, which look and feel like they could crush a shot glass. He figures he can bench-press 300 pounds.

Buck Angel is proud of what his body is and what it used to be. Angel has emerged as the first female-to-male transsexual adult star, and he did it by conquering addiction, weathering the complicated process of gender reassignment and challenging an industry that didn't want him -- at first.

"What I'm doing has never been done before," Angel told XFANZ. "And that's quite a thing to say in this industry."

Pan-gender, pan-sexual

Angel has inverted the usual male-to-female transsexual and shemale genres and made room for a polymorphous sexuality that, although it may not be for everyone, it has something for everyone. Angel said that his main fans are gay men who like watching Angel with men. His second largest audience are lesbians who like watching Angel with women. Still after that, Angel appeals to straight men, who like watching Angel with men and women.

When Angel started doing adult movies a few years ago, he was ready to succeed. He didn't.

"I thought the industry would be into me, but it was just -- slam, slam, slam, slam!" he said, referring to slamming doors. "They said, 'You're a freak.'"

But since then, Angel has built a loyal following of fans and attracted a core group of performers who enjoy appearing in his movies, which combine an alt-porn feel (tattoos, leather, piercings) with pan-gender action. Women and men go down on Buck, who sometimes wears a strap-on dildo, and who sometimes simply goes with his vagina. Angel still has vaginal intercourse, and he still has the added bonus of being able to have the multiple orgasms of a woman.

"I usually come from my clit, but I like to get fucked, too," he said.

Safe sex, positive energy and mainstream exposure

Angel's movies, though, are about more than just unexpected new forms of sex. They challenge what it means to be male or female, while also throwing down the gauntlet of safe sex to an industry that tests its performers assiduously for STDs but often asks them to perform bareback. If you're watching Angel use a dildo -- whether someone is sucking on a strap-on or whether Angel is using it on himself -- that dildo has a condom on it. Angel, who has many friends with AIDS and who has lost many friends to AIDS, demands such caution, especially in adult entertainment.

"We have a commitment to show everyone that it's sexy to have safe sex," he said.

Angel's persistence has also translated to success in the adult industry and recognition in the mainstream media. He's appeared on Maury Povich's show (Povich apparently wasn't an asshole) and ridden on Howard Stern's Sybian machine. Angel's ride on the famed Sybian also put him into an elite category: people who have shocked Howard Stern.

But despite his ability to shock, Angel isn't out to shock. Besides his tacit safe-sex message, Angel said he wants to bring a positive energy to the adult industry while also helping America loosen up when it comes to sex.

"Men are always taught to be men," he said. "They're taught never to cry. Men shouldn't be taught to be total men. Men should get more in touch with their feminine side."

"When I got my first shot of testosterone ..."

Angel said that although he's the first female-to-male adult star, he's not the first female-to-male transsexual to keep his vagina instead of opting for genital reassignment. Women undergoing sex reassignment either have their clitoris enlarged or receive a mostly prosthetic penis built from skin grafts. Angel chose neither.

"Why would I want to replace something that gives me so much pleasure with something that gives me no pleasure?" he said.

He further added that he stays in good shape not only to be more attractive, but also to set a good example for fellow female-to-male transsexuals. It's paid off, too. When he first arrived on the scene, Angel said he got a lot of hate mail, which has since dwindled.

"One guy who wrote to me was suicidal," Angel said. "And when he found out about me, about who I am and what I do, it changed his whole life."

That's a familiar narrative for Angel, who said he was addicted to cocaine and crystal meth when he was a woman.

"But when I got that first shot of testosterone, I was like, 'I'm home. That's it,'" he said.

It wasn't just a one-shot fix for Angel, though. He had to go through five years of counseling before that first injection, and then chest surgery after that. But he said that as soon as he realized that his mental problems arose from gender, the problems disappeared -- he's now 16 years sober.

Unfortunately, even though Angel straightened out his life by becoming a man, he still has to deal with America's conservative attitude toward sex. Even though Adult Video News nominated him as transsexual performer of the year -- the first female-to-male in that category -- he still had to go with a European distribution company for his movies.

But despite the resistance to him being him, Angel isn't planning to give up.

"Where do I fit? Why do I bother people so much? I think we're in a sexual renaissance, and one day the world will be sexually free."